Don't Do These Five Things for Valentine's

5. Don’t Make It All About You

You may be able to get away with those ”it’s for you, but it’s really for me” presents during Christmas (Did you really think he wanted that 60-inch 3D television after hinting all fall about season tickets to the Kennedy Center?), but you simply cannot during Valentine’s Day.

Relationships are hard work. If you’ve only been together a short time, you’re doing the hard work of getting to know each other. If you’ve been together a long time, you’re doing the hard work of staying together even though you know each other all too well. Either way, given all the burdens and requirements of everyday life, your thoughts about your relationship can easily become focused on you: your needs, your wants, your desires.

So put them aside for the day. Make it about her needs, her wants, her desires. Join in his fascination with each and every edition of Real Housewives. Go see the art exhibit you’ve heard her talking about. Take him shopping at Abercrombie & Fitch even if you think he’s too old for it.

It’s not about you. At least, until your special someone decides to focus on your needs, your wants, your desires. See how it all works out? Now go make each other happy.

And don’t stop when Valentine’s Day is over.

Sean Bugg is Editor Emeritus for Metro Weekly.

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