Metro Weekly

Horoscope

July 31-August 5, 2008

Heavenly Round-Up: Summer gets shorter and shorter, doesn’t it? Have you done what you meant to? Are you on top of your leisure game and down-time strategies? If you won’t relax now, when? If you don’t take a holiday, who does? Ask not what you can do for your time off, ask what your time off can do for you. A richness, a luxury is in the air. Hold off on spending until you dig for the facts about your new-found treasure.

Aries: Send out for something amusing. You’re a little bored with the repetition of your daily life. If you’re not reengaged in your present environment, you may well charge off into more stimulating pastures. Could you redecorate in warm colors? Would you consider a makeover?

Taurus: You’re not up to speed on what’s going down, and the distraction is coming from the home front. Do you need to shift gears to find your righteous groove on this one? Or would you serve your ends best by reassessing radically? Curb procrastination with luscious bribes.

Gemini: You’ve been taking any excuse to dodge what needs doing. And life offers you plenty of juicy good ones. But it’s time to buckle down and get to where you’re firing on at least three of your four cylinders, n’est-ce pas? Well-organized is sexier than you know. Try it out.

Cancer: Is it fun? Is it affordable? Is it necessary? Any two out of three of these will do for now. Check your desire for perfection at the door. You’ll be better served by relaxing and letting the flow take you into vistas never before perceived or experienced. Get close up.

Leo: Like a pupa in a chrysalis, you’re not quite ready to be shown to the world in your transformed glory. But that time is nigh and getting nigher by the second. Make your arrangements, prep your setting, and don’t forget to fine-tune all those rough edges. Soon.

Virgo: If you can’t wait to get from here to there, you’ll end up using the metaphorical equivalent of the broken rope bridge in an adventure movie. If you could just hold your water or your horses for another half cycle, of any description, you would find the way made plain.

Libra: Simplicity is more complicated than it looks. You allege a desire for something less fussed and fussy. You’re even sincere. Open a dialogue on how much of a shift you want to make, and how close you may be to getting started. Include the lowly in your thinking.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: Persistence is a virtue when it isn’t largely old-fashioned pigheadedness. Be as honest with yourself as you dare, and you may find you haven’t been as constructive as you might have hoped. Rebuild your relationships and your work-habits with equal attentions.

Sagittarius: You’ve been an optimistic thinker for too long now to quit. Despite recent set backs and current stress, you’re further than can imagine down the road to initial success. If you want to create something deeper and more lasting, you’ll need to be even more positive.

Capricorn: Once upon a time cuts little ice with you. But the heroes and heroines of the fairy tales were a plucky, ”git ‘er done” kind of crew. Take away the shining armor and the fluffy dresses and you’ll find folks who put their backs into it and didn’t mind doing the impossible.

Aquarius: Sentience is enough — when it’s applied to something useful. If you’ve been tossing yours at the latest mini-obsession in your life, you’ve done yourself a disservice. Apply the brush broadly when you put your mental powers to the smaller issues in everyday life.

Pisces: Only you can prevent emotional conflagrations as senseless as they are destructive. You can’t help your slight emotional pyromania: Sometimes it’s better for a little something to happen than for nothing to happen. If you have time to fiddle like that, you have time to do.

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Horoscope

July 24-30, 2008

Heavenly Round-Up: Did all that murk spontaneously clear up? Was it something somebody said? Or did? It’s hard to know why everything seems so much brighter all of a sudden. But if it is–and it is–it behooves you to get on with making hay while the sun shines. This is the best of times for bringing into fruition that which you have dreamed of for long months. This is when it can all go down with clarity, force and even charm, if the situation demands.

Aries: You’re still a contender, and the arena’s not too different from how you remember it. You can be the winner who takes all, and you can do so with aplomb and panache. It would be well to be gracious as you crush your enemies beneath the wheels of your victory chariot.

Taurus: You used to be endlessly able. You used to have bottomless funds of tenacity. You used to stay out dancing ’til every hour. Lately, none of those things seems like they’re still in your current repertoire. But you underestimate your ability to bounce back and reap rewards.

Gemini: Look before you speak. There may be a tantalizing visual cue that could break the whole case wide open for you. Don’t forget to pay close attention. The physical details of the situation are calling out for your analysis and interpretation. Take a long lunch on Friday.

Cancer: It’s not a bird or a plane up in the air. In fact, the help you want is of a chthonic sort: You want what comes from deep, down below and within. If you can’t identify with that statement, you may need to reassess your solution to the current set of conditions. Rethink.

Leo: You’re better than the rest of the field. You don’t have to be shy about believing this to be true. But you do have to put up or shut up if you’re directly challenged. You’ve minded your Ps and Qs long enough. Now it’s time to dot every i and cross your Ts. Work.

Virgo: You would be happier if you could trust the effort you put in would be equivalent to the satisfaction you derived therefrom. As it turns out, you might fret less in order to enjoy more. You have every likelihood of short-term success, leading to long-term accomplishment.

Libra: It didn’t have to be you, but it was. And now it is. And without you, the whole thing might well fall apart. You’ve woven yourself into the fabric of being. You’re integral to the Circle of Life in which you make yourself known and felt. You’re not an innocent bystander.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: This isn’t as complicated as you’re trying to make out. In fact, anyone with the sword of reason close to hand might slash through the confabulations of your emotional Gordian knot. Would you prefer to retain control of the situation? Do your own dirty work.

Sagittarius: You try a few times and call it good, whatever the eventual outcome. This is where the test of your true grit comes into play. No matter the temptation to run away, hang tough long enough for the dust settle from the impending implosion. You may or may not have earned it….

Capricorn: Walking the talk is second nature to you. You’re puzzled at how others have become deeply moved and motivated by your simple plan and subsequent actions. You’re never more attractive than when you’re doing what you promised on a reasonable timeline.

Aquarius: It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity. You don’t have to kill the next person to say it. Instead, remove yourself from the overarching condition and free your mind from its pre-occupation with the banal and repetitive. Sink your teeth into something concrete mid-week.

Pisces: Look over around and through. You’ll see what there is to see, and then you’ll remind yourself of what it was you expected from this extra attention to the matter at hand. You’ll be rewarded in a manner as touching as it is innocent of strings attached. Are you that free?

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These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!

Horoscope

July 17-23, 2008

Heavenly Round-Up: It could have been warm and cozy, intimate and undisturbed. But that’s not what’s going down–whether it was too much sensitivity, or not enough (depending on perspective), there’s lots of blame to go around. Break the cycle with superhuman efforts involving charity and faith. If you get that far, you have the right to hope for a brighter tomorrow as soon as today. Cool off with a cool drink and even cooler conversations with people so far in the know they write it.

Aries: It’s not too late. I wouldn’t leave it any longer than you have already, but you can still get in, and you can still make the kind of impression that does you the most good. You know better than to get into an argument over the deadline, or the job specs. Take it like a man!

Taurus: Persistence is nearly enough to get you from here to there. You have the vision. You have the skills. You have the technology. But you’re the only one who can take that first step and begin the process. You’re also the only one with the belief to see it through. Will you?

Gemini: You’ve been through this before. You’ve had to call up your resources, sort through them and then begin the tedious undertaking of sorting through the resources you hold in common. These inventories take time and energy, but you’ll be surprised at the outcomes.

Cancer: Are you where you want to be? Are you even on the right track? Is it easier to get cranky than to get going? Watch your knee-jerk reactions: They might land you in more hot water than even you can climb out of safely. Keep it together, inside and out, for success.

Leo: It’s a dance. Or maybe it’s a rummage sale. Or it could be a board meeting. You’ll be meeting someone powerful, someone who can change the very fabric of your being. But you have to recognize this person — who is not flashy, or even prepossessing. Use your inner eye.

Virgo: How much would you be willing to spend on the perfect relationship? What would you pay to meet Happily-Ever-After? Spend freely with the coin of the heart. You have options you don’t remember, and they’re in possession–if you could only think where you’d put them.

Libra: It’s the walk of victory. Don’t let it get spoiled by the inner voice of minatory pickiness or fussy blandishment. Let go of what you don’t need to hear. Let it wash away on the tide of nearly perfect happiness. There’s a setting into which you fit–you’re there as of Friday.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: You’re good enough. You’re smart enough. And gosh-darn it, some people really do like you. Obviously, not everyone. Obviously, it’s because you’re so afraid of rejection that you hold yourself aloof until folks aren’t sure what to think. Warm up, jump in, lose the ‘tude.

Sagittarius: It’ll be more fun soon. Right now it’s all about the nuts and bolts of the grunt work. If you could delegate it, you would. But you can’t, so you’ll just have to be the best there ever was at getting the sticky work done and over with. Let a smile be your parasol.

Capricorn: You could if you wanted to. This is the mantra to which you must hold yourself accountable. You could have fun… if you wanted to. You could be fabulous… if you wanted to. You can do anything, but you’ll have to put your back and your heart fully into it. Try.

Aquarius: It’s all about the infrastructure. It’s all about the long-term planning. It’s all about the impetus to make things better for having come into your sphere of influence. Get your inner Marshall Plan together. You’ll be ready when the call comes. Wear fakes on Saturday.

Pisces: You’re already swimming with the fishes, so threats won’t do more than roll off your shining back when the time comes. You’re as free as you need to be to make the most of this latest bonanza in opportunities. Resist the urge to hide away. It’s all about your community.

Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism

These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!

Horoscope

July 10-16, 2008

Heavenly Round-Up: Will you tunnel under your obstacle? Will you climb your way over? Are you less concerned about the infrastructure than anyone imagines and planning to blow your way through to the other side? You have all these options and more. But you won’t get much done if you’re waiting for permission or approval. And you won’t win friends or influence people–in a good way–if you just get on with achieving your goal come hell or high-water. Do it your way on Friday.

Aries: Feeling fussy? Not satisfied with the rules or their application? Upset by the imbalance? Would it be easier to swallow if you were the one holding the bulk of the power? Should you try to look at this from the other guy’s point of view? Will you regret it if you don’t? Consider.

Taurus: You’ll get it all done, and you’ll get it done on time–but there may not be much left of you by the time the dust settles. Have you planned to put a break in for yourself? Are you bribing yourself with half days at the spa? You owe it to yourself to do something really nice.

Gemini: It’s not your problem, I grant you. But the fall-out will be landing everywhere, and this means on your turf too. If you offer extra support before anyone asks, you may defray the fraught nature of the scene. If you delay, don’t be surprised by the violent responses.

Cancer: You’ll have to be the point person on copping a grown-up attitude. Some problems can’t be solved any other way. It’s an additional burden when you’ve already got a plateful. Do some therapeutic sorting and thinning in the garden and the closets to regain perspective

Leo: Life is sometimes like a bowl of cherries…. And sometimes it really, really isn’t. Eat the cherries anyway: They’re good for you and delicious. You’ll want the vitamin support to rally your soma through the next unreasonable crunch of work/life pressures. Choose a regimen.

Virgo: It’s not like you to take such a hard line, but sometimes you don’t have much choice. Don’t let the whining get to you. Don’t become distracted by the discomfort of others. You’re not that fortuitously positioned yourself. Have dessert, since it’s suck-it-up-and-deal time.

Libra: You could if you wanted to, but you keep changing your mind. There are so many, many contingencies and you can’t work out any path allowing you to go forward with zero collateral damage. So now you need to work out the next best outcome, and strive for that wholly.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: If it were really what you wanted, would you have that stone in your stomach when you thought about it. Stop compartmentalizing and figure out how to integrate the disparate elements of this conundrum. It’s difficult, but you’re building for the future, not the past.

Sagittarius: You could want what you want when you want it, but that wouldn’t change the facts of the matter or the condition of your circumstances. Get with reality and formulate the necessary shifts in focus and action to allow you to get it done on time and with some élan.

Capricorn: You’ve got the power and you’ve got the motivation. You even have the authority to see this through your way. Will you take up the challenge? Will you rise to the occasion? Or will you duck behind any little sapling or stone and try to dodge your responsibility? Guess.

Aquarius: Some things can’t be solved by p-and-q logic. Some things can’t be predicted based on past performance. You may be at a crux requiring you to marshal the forces around you and lead them collectively into the best of all possible outcomes. Be imaginal and creative.

Pisces: You crave simplicity. You seek support. You desire peace. All of which are good. But you have a different kettle of fish altogether, and they’re not getting any fresher whilst you attempt to reconcile your wishes with reality. Swim against the flow. Find a dream upstream.

Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism

These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!

Horoscope

July 3-9, 2008

Heavenly Round-Up: Are feeling the crunch? Is the pressure building? You might want to check all the relevant gauges to be sure that you’ve got what you want, where you want it. Now would not be a good time for the system to blow. So take the heat off where possible. Slow down the process. Get an extension. Write yourself an excuse. Appreciate your limitations as well as your victories: both have something to teach you. Keep something in your pouch against need or strategy.

Aries: Set any deadline you please. You’ll focus better, push harder and get more done. But at the end of the day, you know the pressure’s self-inflicted. Right? As long as you know you had a choice and took it, you’ll be honest with yourself. Can you then be false to any man?

Taurus: It’s contumely when it isn’t true. Could the facts prove otherwise? You are as you are, and your heart is a broad and fertile plain where almost anything can grow at least once. You are nothing if not a patient gardener of your resources. Will you add to the tribe Sunday?

Gemini: Consistency is a pestering hobgoblin. You resist those blandishments to even out your pace, your contributions, your focus. You can’t be easily browbeaten — being slippery as the occasion demands. But there is such a thing as quality control. Take responsibility.

Cancer: Kindness may be highly underrated amongst the virtues — being neither Roman nor Eastern. But there’s a time and a place to extend oneself and make a compassionate case for someone in greater need and direr circumstance. Being thankful may be the first step here.

Leo: Dream as deeply as you dare to find the lucky penny at the bottom of the well of your unconscious mind. The ends of phases in life carry their own rewards and regrets. Nothing ends without purpose. What new thing could you anticipate if you were to stop grieving?

Virgo: Destiny is a bully chasing you down what looks like a blind alley. When you’re cornered, where will you go? Can you jump or climb your way out? Can you face down the path that calls you and take a victory in the form of acceptance? You have more options.

Libra: Are you fulfilled in your work? Are you allowed to ask yourself that question? Are you prepared to do anything at all about the answer you conjure for yourself? Bully yourself into doing what you’d rather not, and then befriend your inner bully. Get more done on Monday.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: However you remember your aspirations, remember also how sincerely you felt on those topics. Respect your past, your arc of development. In these, you may find the seeds of your future and how best to nurture them from the perspective of the present. Rethink.

Sagittarius: It’s time to jump back into overdrive. You’ve been chilling and hanging and grooving and loving the slack. But there’s so much more yet to do. And your deadlines are creeping up on you like bad underwear. Get the drop on the day unto which evil is sufficient.

Capricorn: You’re suspicious. You’re wary. You don’t consider yourself to be all that — and yet the feedback from a certain quarter necessitates a rethink. Ordinarily, you’re not in the habit of squandering your resources. How will you maximize this new, albeit limited, potential?

Aquarius: Look around. The emphasis is on your personal ethics. The focus is on your own response to the larger situation. You may become a leader, but only if you can follow your inner directive authentically. Get your bodily health back on track sooner rather than later.

Pisces: Walking the talk works for you. It means there’s less to remember as you represent the ”truth” or ”reality” to others. Don’t say one thing if you really mean its opposite. You’ll impress all the right people if you can keep your nose clean and stay close to the literal.

Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism

These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!