Ladies and (not-so-)gentlemen, the circus is back in town. The circus, that is, better known around these parts as Crack. In time for Mardi Gras, the fifth installment of the low-blow high-jinked performance-art party at DC9 is focused on freak shows even freakier -- or at least, more adult -- than you may remember seeing as a kid. Instead of Barnum & Bailey, think "Bareback Riders and Dancing Bears!", to say nothing of "Homoerotic Contortionists and Naked Jump-ropers!" So reports the official notice about the event, which also revealed the names of those who will perform. After watching a zany news report from the Crack News Network, Hearsay decided to get a few more details from Shea Van Horn, otherwise known as Crack's "naughty ringmaster Summer Camp."

Are you sitting down? Performers at this Saturday's show will include former Democratic party operative Mark "Hee-Haw, Hee-Haw" Spengler. Now that he needn't worry about being respectable electable, he's decided to be delectable projectable and don "outrageous, perfectly circus-themed drag." Also to perform is former party promoter Tony "It Takes A" Villa. Having just recently moved back to town, Villa will give "a really over-the-top number" as Trinket Bauble. Then there's the Farris Brothers: Chris will help Summer Camp just as he always does, as one of Crack's crack promoters, while Kevin will actually sing live. Van Horn promises it'll be unusual and hysterical.

Van Horn says the event will be "nastier, glitzier, naked-er" than ever -- but why not just show up and be surprised? And shocked, too. Van Horn says they'll screen a scandalous new video and throw in a couple audience-participation games. Anal ring toss again, perchance?...