On Friday night, Sept. 26, Hearsay wasn’t sure if the debate would still go on. Would the old stalwart grant the young whippersnapper a fair hearing? Or was the state of our economy too dire to discuss trivial things like babies, Botox and boob jobs? No, John “Elect Me and I'll Make Sure to Continue Bush's Mess” McCain and Barack “The Obvious Choice” Obama didn’t discuss such trivial matter in the first Presidential Debate, which went on as scheduled -- and Hearsay enjoyed watching the two spar at Nellie’s, where the restaurant was packed with folks focused on the giant TV screens. It was certainly boisterous for Barack. The storms were brewing and the lightning interfered with the satellite feed a couple times at the very end of the long debate. But Hearsay never could figure out what all those graphics cluttering up CNN’s coverage were trying to indicate anyway -- Blue and Red don’t make Green, and why did William “Stunted Education” Bennett stop keeping score? Maybe he fell asleep.

But the debate – the battle, more accurately – that concerned Hearsay, about babies, Botox and boob jobs went on as scheduled, too, two blocks down at Town, where veteran Madonna soundly defeated maverick Britney in the video battle. Town’s Ed “That Makes Two of Us” Bailey tells Hearsay that he’s brewing even bigger video battles to come, to culminate in something like a spring fling, although he declined to elaborate. Hearsay loves spring almost as much as a fling, so this should be good.