Metro Weekly

Parting Glances: NCLR’s Kate Kendell on 24 years of LGBTQ progress

What the LGBTQ community has witnessed in the past two decades is nothing short of extraordinary

Kate Kendell

Thirty years ago, a close friend gave me a card with a quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail.” It has been tacked somewhere close to my desk ever since. In my 24 years at NCLR — 22 as Executive Director — I was lucky enough to tread a path laid by others and I hope, as I end my tenure at NCLR at the end of this year, also marked some new territory. I am, for sure, about to chart an unknown trail. Since I was 17, I have never not had a job and I have never left a job without knowing exactly where I was going next. I could never afford that freedom and I was not that adventurous.

While I still cannot afford the luxury of choosing not to work, at almost 58, I am ready to swing without a net for a bit. I am not sure exactly what I will be doing next, but I am clear it has been an honor of the highest order to walk this path for over two decades.

When I first came to NCLR, in 1994, I was shocked at the harm and damage being done to far too many LGBTQ people in this country. Coming from Utah, where I grew up Mormon, I believed I had seen the worst. Not even close. From losing jobs and custody of kids, to family acceptance, self-worth, religious community, hope — we heard from dozens of queer people every day who struggled against what felt like a tidal wave of homophobia and stigma.

Now, within the lifetime of a college graduate, we have witnessed a sea change, from out celebrities and openly LGBTQ elected officials, to fierce and unbowed allies and legal and policy wins. The place of LGBTQ individuals and families is cemented in our culture. We still see the lethality of anti-LGBTQ bigotry, but the ethos in our nation is that such bigotry is wrong and unacceptable. More importantly, we know it is wrong and unacceptable. There is nothing wrong with us. We do not need to be fixed. We are beautiful, gifted and worthy. All this, in 24 years. It is breathtaking.

I know that this moment seems particularly perilous, and I am not sanguine about the threat posed by this most venal and cruel Administration. Even as we mark how far we have come, we must have the vigilance and engagement demanded to protect our hard won gains and to assure that the most vulnerable in our community suffer as little as possible.

But, by any measure, what we’ve witnessed in the past two decades is nothing short of extraordinary. All of us share the privilege of being such a witness. We all, in our own way, blazed a path and fought for a day when every LGBTQ person could wake up knowing that who they were and whom they loved did not limit either their opportunities or their dreams. That day, while still distant, is within sight. The fact that we can imagine such a day is a virtual miracle given where we were when I first crossed the threshold of NCLR.

When I walk past that threshold for the last time as Executive Director at the end of the year, I do so with a heart filled to bursting with gratitude that I got to do this work and be part of bending that legendary arc of the moral universe. Now someone else gets to walk this path. Lucky them.

Kate Kendell is the Executive Director for the National Center for Lesbian Rights, a nonprofit committed to advancing LGBT equality through litigation, legislation, policy, and public education across the country. Visit nclrights.org.

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