Metro Weekly

Postmates Serves Up A ‘Bottom-Friendly Menu’ for Pride

Postmates has launched "Eat with Pride," an initiative offering "bottom-friendly" food options from restaurants in L.A. and New York.

Photo: Postmates, via YouTube.

Postmates, the food delivery service providing customers with restaurant-prepared meals, has produced a video in time for Pride Month touting its new “bottom-friendly menu” in select cities.

The adorably animated commercial, featuring a harness-clad eggplant as a “top,” and jockstrap-wearing peaches “bottoms,” shows the pair looking at various foods, some of which are not ideal if one is preparing to engage in anal sex at some point after consumption.

“If you’re a top, it seems like you can eat whatever you want,” Rob Anderson intones as the eggplant wolfs down a taco and three peaches gaze at a melting bowl of ice cubes and sigh. “But if you’re a bottom, you’re expected to starve? Not this Pride!”

To guide would-be bottoms to the right foods that will wreak less havoc on their digestive system, Postmates has partnered with Dr. Evan Goldstein, founder of Future Method/Bespoke Surgical, to develop “Eat with Pride,” a bottom-friendly menu that can be ordered from local restaurants in Los Angeles and New York.

Customers in those two cities with the Postmates app can peruse popular restaurants that provide prepared meals that make it easier to get intimate later.

Restaurants on the list include Prince Street Pizza, Tender Greens, Dialog Cafe, Toccata, Ggiata, Alfred Coffee, H2O Sushi & Izakaya, Octopus Restaurant, and Beatnic.

As the commercial notes, people seeking to bottom are recommended to stay away from whole grains, wheat bran, cauliflower, potatoes, and legumes, which don’t easily dissolve in water.

Bottoms are also recommended to avoid highly processed foods and dairy, which is represented in the video by two half-cupcakes looking over a spilled milkshake, with one saying, “I cannot handle lactose right now! Look at her!”

Anderson then notes, “If you’re going to eat something insoluble, give your body about 24 hours to process all of it.”

Foods recommended for bottoming include soluble fibers and protein, including fish, peas, citrus, white rice, and nuts, with Postmates noting that sushi is considered a bottom-friendly food as well.

The Postmates commercial was conceptualized by a team of LGBTQ employees and launched with the rollout of the bottom-friendly menus on Thursday, June 9.

As part of the initiative, Postmates has made a donation to The Okra Project, a mutual aid collective providing meals and support to Black transgender, nonbinary and gender-nonconforming individuals.

“There’s no right or wrong way to bottom,” the commercial concludes. “But if you’re planning on getting ‘peachy’ this Pride, the bottom-friendly menu on Postmates has the kinds of foods that can keep you feeling good.”

Watch the commercial below.

 

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