Hearsay: September 2007 Archives

Birthdaying and Post-Break-Fasting at the Diner

Posted by Hearsay
September 27, 2007 5:04 PM |

The always-hopping Palm of Gay D.C., the 18th & U Duplex Diner, was the scene of a host of parties last Saturday night, Sept. 22, and Hearsay was there to hiccup its way through the evening. The night kicked off with a private event for Rex "Not My Porn Name" Varner's 40th birthday, given by his boyfriend Tom "My Toast Had Everyone" Balling. Hearsay wasn't supposed to be there, but it hid beneath a table and watched from below, developing a foot fetish in the process. It thought it spied the wingtip of Larry "Please Pass the Toilet Paper" Craig, but realized that certain telltale scuff marks were in the wrong spot.

At precisely 11:32 p.m., Duplex proprietor Eric "I Will Personally Pickle Your Herring" Hirshfield and his hunky-dory staff lowered the drawbridge to the public to celebrate the Diner's ranking on Out Magazine's 50 Best List. It was at this point, Hearsay felt it could emerge from its secret spot and hit the bar, which it did as a horde of birthday boys suddenly swarmed the Diner. Celebrating yet another year of shameless, hedonistic existence were Greg "Always" Smiley, Lawrence "Sweetie I Now Live in Seattle" Yanovitch, Scott "Consuela" Foster, Steve "Post Poste Party" Culbertson, Jeff "Flashdance" Larivee and Justin "Damn, I Already Came!" Cummings. Things got even wilder when the Awesome '80s Prom Party hosted by Horatio "Blanche" Oliveira and someone named after an Ivy League College at the nearby home of Tim "I Hope the Floor Doesn't Cave-in" Isgitt broke up and headed over for late night libations.

A handful of customers manned the makeshift iPod DJ set-up including Jeff "No, I Won't Play Umbrella Again" Aldridge, Kamran "Pump up the Jam" Naim and Kris "Bringing Back the '80s" Nelson. Hearsay suggests they don't quit their day jobs anytime soon.

Also celebrating this same night after their Yom Kippur Breakfast Dinner were Wes "I Got Straight (I Mean Gay) A's in Hebrew School" Combs, Gary "Hell Yeah, I Fasted! I Fasted Faster than Anyone's Ever Fasted Before!" Seiden, and Marvin & Dan, freshly cleansed of their sins, who schlepped all the way from Baltimore for a bagel and a shmear and a sliver -- "just a sliver, we're watching our sodium intake" -- of lox. It was a happy new year for all....

Going to Town

Posted by Hearsay
September 24, 2007 7:58 AM |

Town logo.jpgThere's a lot of buzz this week, especially surrounding nightlife in the city. Some say there's a surge coming. Hearsay thinks it's going to be more like a tsunami, if what's happening over at the new spot being crafted by Ed "Excitable Boy" Bailey and John "Werewolves of London" Guggenmos is any indication. Donning a hard hat and a worn plaid shirt, and pulling a pair of dusty, dirty jeans down to reveal just a tip of hairy butt-crack, Hearsay disguised itself as a construction worker and secretly wandered into the site that will soon be known as Town, whose e-mail list you can join by clicking here. Construction within is well underway, and from what Hearsay can tell, this two-floor dance venue is going to be a place unlike any other ever seen in Washington. Hearsay has already gathered quite a bit of top secret information and will be revealing bits and pieces of it in the coming weeks. Meanwhile, here's something to whet your whistle: A local nightlife powerhouse, whose name includes the letters "A," "E," "G" and "Z," will be making a regular Saturday night return to Town when it opens later this year. Guess the name and e-mail it along with your return e-mail and phone number to Hearsay@metroweekly.com, and you could be one of three lucky winners (drawn at random from all correct entries received) to receive a pair of movie passes to Landmark Theaters and a rumpled $20 bill to cover your popcorn, drink and candy expenses. After all, what's a night at the movies without a few concessions?....

Power Washer...

Posted by Hearsay
September 14, 2007 8:58 PM |

Here's something unlikely to happen at tomorrow night's Gay & Lesbian Night at King's Dominion...

Bathroom Stalling...

Posted by Hearsay
September 14, 2007 8:49 AM |

It always seemed improbable to Hearsay anyway, but now the world knows just how unappealing it is to hook up in Larry Craig's Union Station. bathroom stall.jpgNo one will wanna go there after reading Jason "Get Paid for Cruising Bathrooms -- I'll Show You How!" Cherkis's undercover report from the hub's stalls. As Cherkis notes in this week's Washington City Paper, there's too much traffic for much of any actual sex, so instead you just have Sbarro and little shits and then, of course, real shit -- and then a few other odds and ends, like "a large black comb wrapped in what appears to be used toilet paper." Why, Miss Lena Lett, what were you doing there?

Cherkis sums it up:

There are other places to take up Craig's legacy. Safer places. Cleaner places.

And with that, Hearsay's off to find dreamier places to cream....

A Dominion Fit for a King Queen

Posted by Hearsay
September 13, 2007 6:16 PM |

There's the Rebel Yell -- yee-haw! -- the Volcano -- swish! -- and the Hypersonic XLC -- swoosh and lose your lunch (or cotton candy)! But hands down the most unforgettable ride of Hearsay's thrill-seeking little life is King's Dominion's Drop Zone Stunt Tower. It's a quickie of a ride, lasting less than two minutes. And most of the time is spent getting it up. But once up, it's down in a hurry. It shoots faster than you can handle. Ah! Eh! Oh! Ah! pc_dz_sm2.jpg. Sounds like your trick from last Saturday? Well just give it a try. Hearsay promises as long as you got a close friend or a group with you for support, you'll go back for more, more, more.

And how's this for support? This Saturday night, King's Dominion is closed to the public and only open to upwards of 2,000 gays and gay-friendly revelers as a fundraiser for Brother Help Thyself .It's the first year the benefit has been organized without longtime BHT leader and Hearsay BFF Larry "Let It Out!" Stansbury. Even if you aren't much into rollercoasters or cotton candy, from 11pm to 1am you can shake yourself loose dancing on International Street. DJ Jason -- aka Green Lantern bartender/emcee as well as Chaos resident Jason Horswill, aka DJ Lady Coco, aka former Miss BHT and Mr. Military Mischief Maker -- promises a set that's "very vocal -- screaming queens."

That makes for screaming queens all around, and one very happy King! Get $27 advance tickets at Lambda Rising or the Green Lantern, or $30 day-of tickets at the park....

The terror of the tearful...

Posted by Hearsay
September 12, 2007 10:10 PM |

Looks like somebody forgot to take their meds....

No need for Hint #2...

Posted by Hearsay
September 12, 2007 7:41 PM |

Well, there's no point in giving you a second hint, since the cat's out of the Ziploc, so to speak. In its current issue, Out Magazine named our own local Duplex Diner as one of its 50 Greatest Gay Bars in the World." Writes the magazine:

D.C.'s gay A-list assembles at this tchotchke temple every Thursday night to gawk and squawk. Though the lobbyists and Supreme Court clerks that gather there are a highly compensated bunch, it seems like no one pays to play, since they've all slept with the hunky bartenders.

So that explains why Hearsay still gets a check.

Hearsay heartily congratulates Eric "Asbury Juke" Hirshfeld and his staff of assorted hunks, honeys and hussies on the honor....

Children Shouldn't Play with YouTube...

Posted by Hearsay
September 11, 2007 10:32 PM |

There are things out there that even leave Hearsay speechless....

...In the World, Hint #1

Posted by Hearsay
September 8, 2007 9:52 PM |

Waka Waka Waka.jpgYou might have guessed already what D.C. gay establishment Out Magazine named as one of the best gay bars in the world. But in case you haven't, here's a little visual clue. Stay tuned....

Clapping -- er, Tapping -- for Larry Craig...

Posted by Hearsay
September 8, 2007 7:50 PM |

Hearsay can't get enough of this one...

Special thanks to Mark "I'd Rather Knock than Tap" Lee for unearthing it....

Hunting Thomas Roberts

Posted by Hearsay
September 8, 2007 6:12 PM |

Thomas-Roberts.jpgThere are reports of Thomas "Anchors Away" Roberts carousing at Cobalt, Halo and Duplex Diner. But somehow, Hearsay has missed seeing the out former CNN Headline News anchor there, or anywhere around town, for that matter. Roberts is now part of the Pat "They're Always After Me Lucky Charms" O'Brien-helmed tawdry show The Insider. And now he's wrapped up in some tawdry gossip of his own. DListed purports to have naked full-frontal and full-bottom shots of Roberts. And the shots were apparently taken from his Manhunt profile. Somehow, Hearsay has missed seeing those before, too. These shots don't show Roberts' face. So, of course, there's no proof it's actually Roberts. In a statement the the New York Daily News, a spokesman at The Insider didn't confirm or deny the legitimacy of the pix . He simply expressed dismay that Roberts has now become a "victim of this malicious personal attack." Victim? Malicious? Clearly he's not using Manhunt for good.

But short of asking Roberts directly -- and that's just not Hearsay's behind-the-back style, especially with a backside that nice -- the only way to find out is to ask you, the D.C. bar- and Manhunt-hopping community. Does little Roberts really look like that? Or at least, have you seen him out and about? And by "him," Hearsay means either big or little Roberts. Send Hearsay a note by clicking down below....

Delirious Debut

Posted by Hearsay
September 8, 2007 1:02 PM |

Hearsay still mourns the day, years ago, when it woke up and was told to leave by Mr. P's staff. You can't pass out here again, they said, and you can't come here again, either, this place is closed. It's taken years to get over that tragedy -- and Hearsay's still got the scars and the bad knees to prove it. pasha.jpgBut now, Hearsay's thrilled to be able to return to the space again, now reborn and re-imagined as the magical and mystical Pasha. What a change! You walk up the stairs, and all you see is bright lights and floor-to-ceiling glass -- you can see everything that everyone is doing. And what a nice space it is, too.

This new lounge isn't gay, but it is beginning to have gay-themed parties, including Friday night's international and Latin party, Somos, and Bill "Beach Boy" Alldredge's Delirium Sundays, which kicked off over Labor Day weekend. Alldredge is the man behind Rehoboth's popular Atmos Events, and the D.C. resident says he was finally ready to bring his promoting experience to the Nation's Capital. The intent was in part to replace Mark "Neighborhood Needs" Lee's Lizard Lounge and offer the city a Sunday night dance venue. But Delirium is being touted even more as a Sunday tea dance, with doors opening at 5 p.m. and closing at 1 a.m. on regular Sundays and at 2 a.m. on holidays, to ensure patrons aren't too disturbing to the neighbors.

Hearsay didn't make it for the early part of the evening last Sunday, when local boy Kevin "High Regard" DuRard spun tea-dance tunes. Hearsay also arrived just a few minutes too late to catch Rachel "New York It Girl" Panay's performance. Also helping Alldredge christen his new party was DJ Michele "Spinmaster" Miruski, the former Velvet Nation resident who has been sorely missed around these here parts. Miruski added her high-energy beats to help the sizable, diverse crowd get into high spirits, even if, as Alldredge said, they had trouble finding the dance floor. You see that big square hole in the ceiling in the middle of the room, right after you enter? That's where you're supposed to dance, people! Work the poles, so the people on the second level can watch you dance. That's what it's all about. Some of the boys who figured it out included Mack "Keebler" Brown and Jay "Entemann" Campbell, and visiting from North Carolina Ivan "Northern" Canada and Mike "Southern" Baker. This week Delirium begins its regular Sunday night, with Rehoboth regular Ting "Tang Walla Walla Bing Bang" Azarcon handling tea dance duties until 9 p.m., and DuRaaaaaard taking over for prime time. If you've got an Atmos Card, entry is free until 7 p.m., and then always $5 less than the poor souls who don't have the card. But the card is free, so what are you waiting for? Go get carded....

Panay Goes Virginia

Posted by Hearsay
September 7, 2007 8:10 AM |

Hearsay frequently gets notes from performers about their special appearances. Hearsay generally files these announcements under "Self-Promotional PR Crap" with intent to revisit them later. But Hearsay then goes out and -- well, you know the story -- drinks fifteen-too-many dirty martinis (shaken, then stirred, then stirred again, then shaken, then drizzled, then shaken one more time for good measure), and forgets all about the notices, which go unseen, unsung, unheard, unattended to, just plain un. Well not this time! Not now that Hearsay has a daily obligation to post something to this website, lest the wrath of the almighty Editor be felt full force and Hearsay's precious supply of imported Lithuanian garlic-stuffed olives is given the padlock treatment! So, that said, here's what Hearsay received this morning from Miss Rachel "I Live in New York, but I Can't Seem to Leave D.C." Panay, a rising divette on the music scene.2005-08-25_clublife_1727_2514.jpg

I am singing at Freddie's in Va. this Saturday, 9/8 at 9pm. My sets will include songs made famous by artists like Frank Sinatra, Ella Fitzgerald, Sarah Vaughn, Liza Minelli & Michael Buble! I'll cap it off with a performance of my new single "Its Got To Be Love" AND I will have some free giveaways of my full album as well as copies for sale in case you haven't bought it yet! Hope to spend some quality time with you in the intimate but lively ambiance of jazz ballads and big band swing....

Then on Sunday, 9/9 I will be out and about early to hear DJ Ting spin at Delirium the new DC party in Dupont Circle at P St. & 22nd. Ting will be debuting new mixes of my songs "Its Got To Be Love" and "Shine On". Don't miss it! He'll be followed by DJ Kevin DuRard....

AND if you have a free moment, please check out ANOTHER incredible review and feature titled "Love at First Listen" at this link! I am blown away at how much great press my album is getting all over the country! Hope you enjoy!

Hope to see you all there!


There. Everyone happy? Okay. Hearsay is now going back to bed with a hot water bottle, a moistened Q-Tip and one of its four cats. Who will be the lucky little pussytat this morning? Here kitty, kitty....

...In the World.

Posted by Hearsay
September 6, 2007 9:53 PM |

What local bar has been named by Out Magazine as one of the 50 best gay bars in the world? The answer is coming soon, very soon....

Be Bar Be One!

Posted by Hearsay
September 6, 2007 12:30 PM |

AGrateLoveCheeseGraterFavorUnpackaged.jpgRemember back in January, when you vowed to lose weight, watch less TV, have more sex with strangers, sleep less, party harder and finally move that cheese grater to the bedroom where it could get more action? Hearsay bets you didn't live up to your New Year's Resolutions -- probably because of that damn boyfriend. He's always getting in the way! Hearsay can't even remember its New Year's Resolutions. But here's what Hearsay has resolved anyway. To Be:Older. Be:Drunk. Be:Broke. And, always after, Be:Better.

Which brings Hearsay to last Saturday, Sept. 1, when it helped Be Bar celebrate its first anniversary of bettering 9th Street. (And just for fun, here are Scene shots from Be Bar's grand opening a year ago!) 2006-08-24_feature_story_2271_3090.jpgA Be:Bronzed Mike Watson was be:celebrating by wearing nothing but a be:boxer-style swimsuit, while his fellow co-owner Be:Buoyant Thomas McGuire was less be:spectacled but no less be:celebrating. The entire place was be:beaming, in fact -- and be:glistening too, especially when the night's tag-team DJs Alan "You Lift Me Up" Chasan and Bill "Where I Belong" Keart dropped "Get Me Bodied." Beyonce is right: "A little sweat ain't never hurt nobody!" The main lounge area was packed with an intriguingly diverse crowd, from women to drag queens and points in between, and from twinks to bodybuilders but no points in between, enjoying, at least those in the door before 11 p.m., complimentary cocktails, including Mount Gay Rum Mojitos. Who could possibly turn down something from Mount Gay? There was also the DeKeypur ice sculpture in the middle of the room that people couldn't help but touch. Oooh, look, it's ice, ice baby! Poor Jean-Philippe Aviance learned this the hard way.

As much as Saturday night was a birthday party for Be Bar, it was also the launch of a new level. Be:VIP is literally above the dance floor but is its own "self-contained destination," complete with couches and private cabanas and lighted foliage all around and overhead. Watson spent much of his night up there, helping out with his team of Cabana Boys and Ladies who, true to Be Bar's fashion philosophy, always come out on this side of chi-chi on the thin thread line that separates it from slutty. The VIP Suite is part of a new complicated "Be:Rewarded" program that Be Bar has launched, whereby every dollar a drinker bee spends at the joint earns him five points on the card. Eventually, if you drink enough, you will gain platinum or even black card status, which earns you admission to the Be:VIP. But if you ain't that much of a gin-guzzler, then you can simply buy a VIP band from someone on staff, or book a VIP cabana for you and your friends. With the VIP Suite, Be Bar is this city's first gay bar offering bottle service, which does not mean they'll hold the bottle for you as you drink, though if you insist, Hearsay's sure that could be arranged. No, little lambs, bottle service involves you picking out the big bottle of libations of your choosing -- vodka, gin, Jagermeister, or even water that's "bottled at the source," which does not mean someone turned on a tap at the 14th Street theater space and filled a bucket. The busy Be:Bees will then add fresh fruit, mixers, glassware and complimentary Red Bull and Voss water to complete the service. With bottles priced as low as $150 and as high as $495 (for Hennessy XO) -- and a $300 minimum to reserve a cabana, Hearsay is seriously on the hunt for a sugar daddy to enjoy this new level of Be:dazzled. But too late! The cabanas are already booked for New Year's Eve, Watson says. Hearsay Be:sad....

Blowoff Takes Manhattan

Posted by Hearsay
September 6, 2007 10:01 AM |

Rich and Bob Blowoff.jpgBlowoff is the latest homegrown gay D.C. brand to branch out of town. Bob "Pour a Little Sugar on it Baby" Mould and Rich "I'm Not A Mushroom, Dammit!" Morel's manly music party, started in a closet at the 9:30 Club five years ago and is now taking over a ballroom in Manhattan. All Hearsay can say is, Watch Out, New Yawk, you're in for one hell of a muscley manly night!. Grrrrowl!

While in New York for this Saturday's inaugural round of Blowoff at the Highline Ballroom , Hearsay is planning to make a full weekend of it. blowoff crowd.jpgManhattan already has a Blowoff-equivalent party in SNAXX, the muscle-bear preserve featuring the sounds of DJs Rich King and Gustavo. That weekly whistle-wetter happens in a closet at the Westside Tavern on Friday night. But Sunday is the extra-special SuperSNAXX, which hibernates at Cielo, the hidden-treasure nightclub den featuring the city's best sound system and its most intimate space. Also next weekend in New York is something called Hustlaball 2007 at Club Rebel. But since Hearsay never pays for sex -- well, never intentionally -- it will settle for the ball to be had at the NYC Eagle, popular any night of the weekend but especially Sunday for the friendly and frisky Beer Bust.

If you can't make it to this week's Blowoff NYC, don't worry: the boys will return to the Highline in December, for what could become a quarterly event. But they haven't flown the coop, either: the monthly edition of Blowoff at the 9:30 Club continues next Saturday, Sept. 15...