Metro Weekly

Truly Yours

Too shy guy? Religious guilt over gay sex? Boyfriend with a balloon fetish?

Truly Yours by Lena Lett

Dear Lena,

I am a student spending a summer in D.C. doing an internship. All of my friends from school are back at home and I haven’t really been meeting many people who I can be social with. I’m a little too shy to go to a club alone. Any suggestions?


D.C. is teeming with interns and newcomers (and even some old timers) in bars and nightclubs in the same position as you — their shyness keeps them from reaching out to the others around them. I know it sounds scary, particularly for someone without a lot of experience with the gay scene, but I encourage you to get over that shyness and take that first step out by yourself. Don’t expect to meet the friend of a lifetime your first time out, but stay relaxed and open to meeting new people.

If, however, it turns out that heading out alone for the evening really is not your scene, then you can always rely on the web, the gym, or even people you meet at your summer internship. People are everywhere, and they have an odd way of becoming your friends if you’re open to the possibility. Remember, my little ennui-riddled sugarplum, your shyness is the only true obstacle there is in meeting new people.

Dear Lena,

I am single and want to go out and have fun with other guys. The problem being I was raised very religious and although I am no longer practicing, I have this extreme guilt about sex. I have only done the deed once before and it just really freaks me out. It’s not that I don’t love the physical aspects of it, but I felt guilty for weeks. How can I find the compromise and have fun once in a while?

–Religiously Guilty

Sweetheart, you have to ask yourself a question: "What do I believe the truth to be?" Ultimately, you are the one that has to live with the answer to that question. I would also pose this question to you: "Could a God who created all things be angered by your loving his creation?" I don’t believe so. Your feelings of guilt are a self-imposed jail that has been reinforced by years of conditioning. You hold the key to that jail — you have the power to free yourself or remain your own prison warden. Giving God his due does not require you to be unhappy.

Dear Lena,

My boyfriend has a balloon fetish! He loves rubbing them all over himself and using them during sex. His ultimate fantasy is having a balloon squished between us when making love. So, what’s the problem? I’m allergic to the rubber in balloons. I break out in a skin rash. What can we do to compromise?

–Don’t Like to Blow

Just when you think you’ve got problems, along comes someone to remind you that there is still more crazy shit out there. Thank you, honey. In answer to your question, balloons can be made from both latex and mylar. Experiment with both to see if that solves your rash problem. If not, you may want to speak to your doctor about your allergy, which is fairly common. I’m sure one of these solutions will deflate your current problem.

Lovelorn? Love Lorne? Love Lorne Green? Lena will solve your problem at the cost of a question. E-mail her at or visit  to fill out a handy webform.

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