Metro Weekly

Horoscope

March 27-April 2, 2008

Heavenly Round Up: You knew what you were getting into, but weren’t into dialoguing with your inner parent on the day. Does this mean that you have to tell yourself that you told you so? It’s not the end of the world, though it shares some karmic shifts with that apocalyptic concept. Go deep to find a message fresh enough to carry you into the burgeoning season. You’ll know what you really want at the last minute. Will the circumstances permit your satisfaction? Go for broke on Saturday.

Aries: Can you remember how you got started down this path? Can you remember what you secretly promised yourself at the time? Is it time to come clean? Is it time to get real? Ask a friend to tell you — you won’t like what you hear, but you’ll be the better for hearing it. Try it.

Taurus: Ask yourself if you’re better off now than you were two years ago. This isn’t about regret, it’s about forward motion. You’ll get there, and it will have been worth the trip. Let your life speak and you’ll find that your heart chakra opens like a lotus in moonlight. Rejoice.

Gemini: Is it time to quit? Is it time to give up? Is it time to release? You still don’t have to know the answer to these questions. You do have to take responsibility for how much this procrastination is costing your self, let alone others. Don’t be grim, wear bold stripes Tuesday.

Cancer: It isn’t your problem, but you’ve got yourself entangled in it. Will you fight your way out, or wait to be rescued? Only your inner healer knows the probable future this time. Listen to your own good advice. Resolve to take the next step when you’re feeling lucky.

Leo: Tell me you didn’t just go there. And in public? And by accident? You don’t usually play the prat-fall clown. This is not your regular role. Could you play it off as intentional, and crafty with it? Don’t pretend to fine irony for any longer than you must. Consult with a Libra.

Virgo: How long has it been? Actually, there are miracles in formative states all around you. But if you can’t find the good, however unprepossessing the circumstances or landscape, you’re apt to miss the riches and inner benefits that could already be yours. Stay the course.

Libra: Readier to hide than to walk like an Egyptian? It might be that kind of a week. But you have choices. You can choose the sofa, the internet, or even the park. There are all kinds of places where you’re invisible for all intents and purposes. Hide in plain sight for bonus points!

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: Let go and let yourself free fall out of your rut and into a world turned upside down. Like any major shift in perspective, there will be growing pains. But you’re tough enough to feel the burn and like it. Call on a Capricorn to get the skinny on your next best investment.

Sagittarius: Is it sense that drives you, or sentimentality? You need to pick a point of view and try to hold it until you can manage its implications. Once you’ve gotten that far, you’re free to take a different stance altogether, but with the same stricture as before. You knew?

Capricorn: You weren’t wrong, and you’re still not. You don’t have to believe everything you hear, and you have to believe that there’s more to it than what you’ll ever hear. Can you trust these circumstances? Is it still your turn? Consider your five-year plan before taking action.

Aquarius: It’s a form of self-defense. It looks like the opposite, but that’s where it gets all tricky and Art of War-ish. You’re clever enough to look three moves ahead and take those variables into account. Go with the conservative estimate and you’ll be grateful soon enough.

Pisces: Take the extra time you’ll need to mind your Ps and tend to your Qs. There’s a lot swirling around on all different levels presently, and you need to allow yourself to watch and join by dint of your own inner rhythm. Haste makes waste, so saunter with impunity Sunday.

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Horoscope

March 20-26, 2008

Heavenly Round Up: It’s a brand new, beautiful day. There’s a shift in perspective being born every minute, but this cycle is especially powerful in its ability to work with us to max out our inner need for growth and differentiation. Now is the time to choose a fresh path. Now is the time to turn over a new leaf. Now is the time to pick those colors for your wardrobe/the living-room/a convention. Give yourself extra slack as you go about the world in a highly creative, highly distractable frame of mind.

Aries: Is what you see what you get? Look closely, the ruler of mirrors holds sway, and you might be in a fun house with very little to do but look around. Trust your intuition. Ignore all those shiny surfaces and you’ll know what you can do to make a concrete difference. Dance.

Taurus: Is this what you’ve been waiting on? It’s taken so long to get here, you might not even remember what set you off on this long, strange trip. But you’re in spitting distance of your destination, and you’re beginning to reflect. Go for the gold — you have the juice for it.

Gemini: It is what it is, no question. You’re not the one on the hook, so you’ll avoid the worst of the blowback on this. Yet keeping a low-profile might not befit your moral stance, or your commitment to making a difference. Stick your neck out to learn where you’re vulnerable.

Cancer: You’re the spindle on which your personal universe turns-no question. But you have others to take into account, if you want all to be well in your microcosm. Inclusiveness may mean some pleasures are deferred. Others, unsuspected, may leap into the breach for you.

Leo: Get a grip on your visioning. It’s time to set that puppy in motion in the manifest world. You’ll see more done if you start early. You’ll be able to delegate more effectively and use a deeper strategy if you get going now. Use your leadership skills to find someone to follow.

Virgo: Simplicity isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. You’ve been paring down and refining and thinning out for the longest time. Now switch tactics and allow for proliferation. You could find that there’s peace in plenty and multiplicity. Assume there’s no one right way to do this.

Libra: Will you take a time out to catch your breath? You didn’t know you’d be the focus. It’s not that you’re shy, it’s that you’re not as prepared as you would have liked to have been. So turn on your famous smile and charm your way through the issues at hand. Call on an Aries.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: Peace in your time may not come with full honors. Peace in your time may mean compromises and halfway solutions. Don’t reject what isn’t finished and perfect. This is a time of beginnings. Some things aren’t meant to spring fully-armed from their source. Reflect.

Sagittarius: You’re not in trouble; you’re just not on the up-and-up. It’s not your fault you can’t be where you want, when you want, doing as you please. You have the understanding of your community of record and not a whole lot more should be necessary. Relax and ask.

Capricorn: Is it an accident? Is it destiny? Is it time? You’re having difficulty making up your mind. But if you know what the goal is, ask yourself, ”Does this contribute or detract?” It’s not too complicated. Stop making excuses and start building towards what matters. Revolve.

Aquarius: It’s all in the potential, or so you’ve been lead to believe. But it could be in the planning, or the decision-making, or the dialogue, or somewhere else altogether. Leave your preconceptions behind and you’ll be better prepared to take advantage of the next chance.

Pisces: Is it fun, or a gritty hassle? It’s yours to choose. It’s yours to make. You have the freedom and the capability to do just as you please. You have the perspective to make more of what is too little, or to squander that which is overabundant. Be careful what you wish for.

Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism

These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!

Horoscope

March 13-19, 2008

Heavenly Round Up: It’s not what you thought it was, but if you’d had your feelers out you’d be less surprised and less at sixes and sevens. Rise above the unexpected sideways nature of this cycle to get the most out of it. Or sink well in and roll in it until you’re immersed and every orifice is filled with the etheric liquids of the ineffable. Once you’ve given in, you’ll find that all your actions fall into place and everything is copacetic. Consider cutting others the slack you’d like for yourself.

Aries: Don’t look up — look around. The game is everywhere but in the air this time. You might pay more attention to your feet. You may begin to wonder what’s under them, and how deep it all goes. Don’t give up because you feel silly. Your intuitions are right on. You’ve got game.

Taurus: You don’t have to do this the hard way. You don’t have to bleed for the cause. You don’t have to do anything but turn on the charm and let ‘er rip. The world is ready to fall at your feet in the early part of the week. Don’t procrastinate or you could lose your momentum.

Gemini: Call it in the air, but never take your eyes off your opponent. You know the drill forwards and backwards. You know the lay of the land, blindfolded. Peak performance is a given. What will you do with all these skills? How will you prove that you’re still the one? Go!

Cancer: Now is not the time to shilly-shally or dilly-dally. You’ve got other fish to fry. Don’t go getting distracted over the non-essentials. They’re not there for you. Keep your laser-like vision going strong — you’ve got eyes in the back of your head on this one.

Leo: It’s a dance. You can’t see your partner, but you’re not alone. Follow the steps, and be sure to practice the rhythms. Don’t try to customize until you’ve got the basics lodged in the base of your spine. When you know the drill cold, it’ll be time to turn up the heat. Wow ’em!

Virgo: Destiny takes shapes both large and small, impressive and insignificant. Don’t wait for a bolt to fall from the blue. It’s not that kind of epiphany. Instead, find the eternal in the tiny details and the insignificant addenda. Once you’ve sharpened your perceptions, you’re on it.

Libra: Heaven can help with this. But you have to let go of your ”desired” outcomes and take a chance on the big picture reaching farther in its intentions than you ever could. Once you’re there, you’ll find the transition to greatness nearly effortless. Wear blue on Friday.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: The longer you look, the less you’ll see. Let it go and get on with what’s right in front of you. There will be lots of time to meditate on the subtle and to make plots to thwart the mechanisms of eternity. Pretend you’re on a desert island and only bring the essentials.

Sagittarius: How much is enough? When will you have your fill? When will you decide that you’ve reached your cut-off point? Can you do any of this without falling prey to the urge to judge yourself? Why is it so hard to relax and have some fun? Loosen up with a little karaoke.

Capricorn: If you please yourself in your endeavors, others will fall right into line. It’s terribly risky to believe that if you like it everybody else will have no choice but to concur. Allow yourself to go there. Allow yourself to apply faith to the manifest world.

Aquarius: The times aren’t so much a-changin’ as they are a-mutatin’. Is it the increased radiation of conscious regard? Is it the long-term exposure to so many cell phone hours? Use your inner Holmes to solve an irrelevant mystery pointing to concrete information, wisdom.

Pisces: You are where you want to be. Your choices are changing as your perception of them shifts. Are you growing taller, like Alice? Will you make to the other side of the board and become a Queen, as she did? It takes luck and drive and vision and planning. You can do it.

Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism

These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!

Horoscope

March 6-12, 2008

Heavenly Round Up: Change is in the air. Change is in the weather. The change is more natural and more sweeping than we may suspect. Gather up your courage and your hopes, now is the time to set the grand play for passion or power into motion. Give yourself the time you require to fine-tune your strategy-but don’t dilly-dally. You have too much to do and too far to go to linger in the shallows of your quest. Cosmetic changes point to deeper shifts. Follow the money to find the truth.

Aries: You’re trammeled by a preponderance of old business. That stuff is still on the agenda, still on the table. Is it time to achieve resolution of one kind or another? Call a meeting of the facets of your soul to create consensus. Once you make peace with your will, anything’s true.

Taurus: You hate having to hurry. You hate having to stress. Stop procrastinating and you’ll have more time than you know how to burn to get the problem resolved. Promise yourself to listen to your subconscious without becoming distracted. You’ll be back on track in a trice.

Gemini: It’s not your business, but you can’t resist getting involved to hilt. Is this because you’re avoiding the mess in your own demesne? Take inventory within. You’ll find you have the means to fulfill wishes made in near-infancy. Soar with eagles: trust in your intuitions.

Cancer: All of a sudden, the winter blahs are achieving closure faster than you can say, ”spring wardrobe! ” Retail therapy may be part of the solution — but only if you have a target. And only if it will help you to become the best-of-all-possible-selves within one lunar cycle.

Leo: It’s tempting to look ahead and keep your eyes fixed on the shining horizon. But you owe something to your roots, and are too smart to defer the accruing interest on that psychic debt for much longer. Center within and take time to catch up with the Still Small Voice. Hear.

Virgo: It’s not your fault. Luckily, you have the community on your side. Finally, the damned, disjointed creature is getting itself together to take and make a stand. The results won’t be all you’ve hoped for, but they will get you out of this box and onto the next part of your journey.

Libra: Decisions, decisions, everywhere and not a choice amongst ’em. As it turns out, they may be more to your tastes than you can imagine from where you now stand. If there’s a change in your household composition, go with the flow. Don’t wait to call the plumber.

Zodiac table
Zodiac Calendar

CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 20

AQUARIUS
Jan 21-Feb 19

PISCES
Feb 20-Mar 20

ARIES
Mar 21-Apr 20

TAURUS
Apr 21-May 21

GEMINI
May 22-Jun 21

CANCER
Jun 22-Jul 22

LEO
Jul 23-Aug 23

VIRGO
Aug 24-Sep 22

LIBRA
Sep 23-Oct 23

SCORPIO
Oct 24-Nov 22

SAGITTARIUS
Nov 23-Dec 21

Scorpio: Ready for a brand-new you? Tired of the old one? You can’t trade in your soul to get a persona more likable and malleable. But you can resolve to soften the old one in the brine of your experiences and deepening wisdom. Make the most of what you already possess.

Sagittarius: Look both ways (within and without) before you cross. Think twice before you commit. There’s a spirit of treacherous joy loose in the world. It’s dangerous, because hope might motivate you up and out and away from all that used to be an undeniable adventure.

Capricorn: Consternation may set in as you review your progress thus far. You’d thought you were further along than this. Yet you’ve got a great understanding of all that you require to get the job done. Rejoice in your comprehension. Feel your imminent victory. Transform now.

Aquarius: It’s not what you say, it’s what you do. You need to prove your integrity and your commitment with your actions. You need to get off the dime and make your home life the sacred space and time that you so richly deserve. You might even up the ante and go for joy.

Pisces: Tragedy is easy, comedy is hard. Challenge yourself to laugh. Challenge yourself hear every side of the argument and synthesize them into one final summation. Your internal year begins now. The signature of this cycle will inform all that is to come. Play for keeps Friday.

Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism

These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!