Metro Weekly

Coverboy: Robert

Family man meets gypsy dancer

Robert, 25, is one Buffalo, N.Y., native who actually can ”Shuffle Off to Buffalo.” As a professional dancer, that’s kid stuff. ”Shuffling off” is actually something he’s mastered, bouncing from state to state before landing in D.C. He just spent a month in Shanghai, for example. ”The life of a dancer is kind of like being a gypsy,” he says. “But I’m doing things I really enjoy.” Still, if home is where the heart is, Buffalo remains at the top of the list in that Robert is very close to his kin. ”They haven’t missed a show since I started dancing professionally,” he says of his parents. ”I’m such a family man.” Offstage, you might find Shaw-resident Robert at Nellie’s, Town or Cobalt, though he’s partial to a quiet night with friends.

What’s on your nightstand?
My iPad and a lamp.

Coverboy: Robert

Coverboy: Robert

(Photo by Julian Vankim)

What’s in your nightstand drawer?
I don’t have drawer.

And the condoms and lube?
In a box under my bed.

What are your television favorites?
I’m a sucker for any kind of trashy reality show. Real Housewives, Bad Girls Club, America’s Next Top Model and Survivor.

What was your favorite cartoon when you were a kid?
The X-Men.

What superhero would you be?
Storm. I’m not into cross-dressing, but she’s so fierce.

Who’s your greatest influence?
Sounds cliché, but my parents have made me the person I am. They haven’t missed a show since I started dancing professionally.

What’s your greatest fear?
Being alone and old.

Pick three people, living or dead, who you think would make the most fascinating dinner guests imaginable.
Nicki Minaj is a shoe-in. Tina Fey and probably Kristen Wiig. People who can make me laugh are the best people in the world.

Coverboy: Robert

Coverboy: Robert

(Photo by Julian Vankim)

What would you serve?
I would definitely make chicken Marsala. And I make a really bomb chocolate cake from scratch.

How would you describe your dream guy?
He has to make me laugh. And I love a good smile and big arms.

Define good in bed.
If at the end we’re both ready to fall asleep.

Who should star in a movie about your life?
People tell me I look like Matthew Broderick, but I don’t want him to play me. I want Johnny Depp, because he could really get into my psyche.

Who was your first celebrity crush?
Whitney Houston. I saw The Bodyguard when I was a little kid and I kept telling my mother I was going to marry her.

Who gets on your nerves?
Passive-aggressive people. I hate people who beat around the bush.

If your home was burning, what’s the first thing you’d grab while leaving?
My wallet.

What’s your biggest turn-on?
I you have a great smile and big arms. And you have to smell good.

What’s your biggest turn-off?
Bad breath is the biggest turn-off ever.

What’s something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t yet tried?
BASE jumping. I’m a big thrill-seeker.

What’s something you’ve tried that you never want to do again?
Eat fish. Or any seafood. It’s disgusting.

Boxers, briefs or other?
I’m such an elitist when it comes to underwear. It just has to be Calvin Klein. Boxer-briefs or briefs.

Who’s your favorite musical artist?
Nicki Minaj, hands down.

What’s your favorite website?

What’s the most unusual place you’ve had sex?
I don’t kiss and tell.

How about a hint?
I haven’t been anywhere unusual. That’s for the future.

What position do you play in the big baseball game of life?

What’s your favorite retail store?
Topman. And American Apparel.

What’s the most you’ll spend on a haircut?
I have a shaved head. But I’d spend $50, maybe.

What about on shoes?
$800, for a nice pair of boots.

What’s your favorite food to splurge with?
Buffalo chicken wings.

What’s your favorite season?
Summer. I love wearing short-shorts.

What kind of animal would you be?
Manatee. They’re the kindest animals. I wish I could slow down my life to that speed.

What kind of plant would you be?
An aloe plant. I burn easily. I could use myself to heal my sunburns.

What kind of car would you be?
I’ve always wanted a Volkswagen Beetle convertible.

What are you most grateful for?
My health, my family.

What’s something you want more of?
It couldn’t hurt to have more love in my life.

State your life philosophy in 10 words or less.
Just keep dancing through life.