Every December, Grindr releases Grindr Unwrapped, an annual report drawing on data from its more than 15 million monthly users to reveal what LGBTQ people consider culturally relevant and how they behave on the app — from pop-culture tastes to sexual habits, fetishes, and hookup styles.
“With Grindr Unwrapped, you get to see the real diversity in sexual activity, sexual desire, sexual appeal, and see some of the things that are more universal and some that differ culturally between different groups of gay and bisexual men and others using the app,” says Zachary Zane, Grindr’s sex-and-relationship expert.
“I think there’s this kind of beautiful diversity in human sexuality that ranges from the vanilla to the kinky and everywhere in between, and we get to share that,” he continues. “And in doing so, hopefully we help to normalize some of these kinks and let people realize, ‘Hey, maybe you’re not as alone in these desires as it may seem.'”
When it comes to “tags,” a feature that lets users search for — and be found by — others with similar interests, identities, or fetishes, the five most popular were “hung,” “trans,” “bb” (bareback), “dom,” and “feet.”
Zane says tags are an easier way to connect with people who have similar interests.
“I’m on Grindr all the time. I search via tags to see if I have any matches,” he says. “And that makes it easier for me to connect with people who are like-minded, have the same kinks as me, and I will absolutely message someone if that is the case. One of my tags is actually ‘tentacles'” — a reference to anime porn that arose in response to Japanese adult films censoring the genital areas of actors — “and some people don’t even know what that is. So it serves as a great conversation-starter, too.”
Zane says it’s “unsurprising that ‘hung’ is the top tag search. We have an obsession with dick size in the cultural zeitgeist. I think gay men in particular might even be more obsessed with this.”
He also adds that the popularity of the “trans” tag reflects Grindr’s sizable number of trans women, trans men, and nonbinary users, but notes it’s especially striking how many profiles now specify “trans only.”
“Obviously, bi men could be into trans people. But we’re actually seeing more and more men who identify as straight on the app, and a number of them are specifically seeking — and only seeking — trans women, which is interesting,” he says.
Based on in-app data, the United States topped all other countries as the “Daddy Capital of the World.”
“I’m not surprised by that finding,” says Zane. “You see a lot more bear and daddy communities in the United States. The U.S. tends to love that hyper-masculine appeal.”
By comparison, the top five countries with the highest percentage of twinks were Switzerland, the Netherlands, Belgium, Austria, and Germany. Ireland led the field for the largest number of self-identified bears, followed by the U.S., Greece, South Africa, and the United Kingdom.
The report also highlighted a few cultural trends beyond identities and tags.
One finding centers on Grindr’s feature that lets users add their top Spotify songs. Among those who use it, Cardi B’s “W.A.P.” appears most frequently in profiles.
“I think there’s a lot of cis gay men who proudly call their asshole a ‘pussy’ or a ‘bussy,'” says Zane. “And people have strong opinions about that — it could be an immediate turnoff or, for some, it’s a turn-on. The fact that we’re seeing ‘W.A.P.’ is funny because cis gay men don’t have pussies. There’s also irony in that the anus does not self-lubricate the way a vagina does.
“So I think there is a playfulness in this, a sort of pride in effectively saying, ‘My ass is that good. I’m that good of a power bottom. I’m that good at having sex,'” he continues. “I think it’s also playing with gender a bit in the bedroom. I was not expecting that statistic, but it made me smile. I thought it was pretty cool.”
Zane says Grindr’s newest feature — a geographic map that shows nearby profiles based on users’ GPS locations — has become very popular since its launch.
“Grindr can be anything you want it to be, so to have a specific setting or space where you say, ‘Okay, this is for looking for right now. I know exactly where this person is, where they’re cruising,’ that’s a really helpful feature,” he says.
He also highlights another finding from this year’s Grindr Unwrapped: the rise in people whose profiles say they are “looking for friends.” According to the report, Tokyo leads the list of cities where users primarily seek friends, followed by Seattle, Taipei, San Diego, and Minneapolis.
“I think the fact that these large cities have people looking for friends kind of dispels this idea that Grindr is just exclusively a hookup app,” he argues.
Grindr, of course, is still a major entry point for men seeking something more than friendship.
Zane says that among users looking for serious relationships, it’s often more common for gay men to start with a sexual connection that later develops into something more serious.
“Grindr is still one of the main ways where men meet their either husbands or long-term boyfriends,” he says. “It’s so funny ’cause some of them, depending on their age or how new it is, will say it with a smirk or say it as if they’re embarrassed, but there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. This is how people are connecting.”
Zane notes that while hooking up first runs counter to traditional expectations of dating, it’s perfectly reasonable to recognize sexual chemistry before forging a romantic connection. In some instances, he says, that can make dating easier.
“Imagine if you’re dating someone for three months and you do not connect sexually,” he says. “What a bummer that would be!”
"I am my worst critic," says Cesar Toledo, executive director of the Wanda Alston Foundation. "I set really ambitious deadlines for myself, sometimes unrealistic goals, but somehow, through my tenacity and just that call to public service -- and being raised in a humble home where my mom worked three jobs to raise us -- I carry that very hard work ethic with me every day. And because of that, I've been successful in my career path."
Toledo assumed the role as head of the nonprofit dedicated to serving LGBTQ homeless youth earlier this year, succeeding longtime executive director June Crenshaw, who announced she'd be stepping down last fall.
The sudden turn from sunny early autumn to a wintry November left us feeling more than a little light-deprived. But one sure remedy to brighten these gray days is to plan ahead for the joyful whirl of the holiday season.
Should those plans include taking in a fabulous live show here in D.C., Maryland, Virginia, or beyond, it's best to start making your list now and checking it twice. We're here to help with a LGBTQ-focused rundown of the divas, divos, and drag queens who might be jingling your bells from now through December.
Gay Men's Chorus: The Holiday Show -- The GMCW's most popular show every year brings an extravaganza of holiday carols, high-kicking reindeer, and sparkling snowflakes, which sounds like a euphemism for something festive to accompany songs like "O Holy Night," "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer," "Let It Snow," and "Go Tell It on the Mountain" (12/13-14, 12/20, Lincoln Theatre)
An irate customer at a Florida Starbucks was arrested after throwing a tantrum over a Pride flag hanging on the wall.
Police say Tucker Alden Kemp, 31, of Clearwater, entered a Starbucks in St. Petersburg around 9:16 a.m. on October 22. Once inside, he took offense at a Pride flag and asked to speak with the manager, insisting it was offensive and should be replaced with an American flag.
When the manager refused, citing store policy, Kemp allegedly "decided to take matters into his own hands," according to an arrest affidavit obtained by The Smoking Gun.
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