Metro Weekly

Step Back in Time: Gays, Holidays and Stressful Family Roles

”You have all the built-up family expectations and the mythology of the holidays, you have the regular family drama, plus this…. There’s this added tension relating to a family member’s identity, there’s anxiety over secret-keeping…. The holidays are a lot about fantasy…. For some, there can be a deep grief and sense of loss over the shattering of that fantasy. For others, it’s knowing that the holidays are always going to be this hard, thinking, ‘Something about my identity is always going to be a problem.”’

Lisa Gilmore, a counselor at the Center on Halsted, a GLBT community center in Lakeview, Ill, speaking with the Chicago Tribune about stressful issues that can occur when out gay people are expected to downplay their lives around family gatherings for the holidays. One man interviewed says it’s tense for him being around people who are “tolerating” him. Another young man says he has to put on a “performance” of a life before he came out to his parents. And one woman says she’s going to spend time with friends instead because last year people kept asking if she was married and wanted to have kids. (Chicago Tribune)

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