Average Penis Size Study Reveals Most Men Overestimate
A 3,000-person survey finds widespread overestimation and shows how size perception impacts confidence and relationships.
As surveys go, Gallup’s equestrian-adjacent name might make someone think of a horse. So, too, might a recent survey executed by LGBTQ-focused Bespoke Surgical: “The Average Penis Size in Every State.”
Billed as the “leading private practice specializing in an elite standard of sexual health and wellness care in New York City,” Bespoke asked its more than 3,000 participants to answer questions not just about penis size, but about how that might affect their relationships or their confidence, among other things.
“Once a quarter, we conduct surveys at the intersection of brand relevance and broader cultural conversation, looking at what’s happening across the LGBTQ+ and sexual health/wellness spaces and putting real data behind those topics,” explains Bespoke founder and CEO, Dr. Evan Goldstein, adding that past surveys have examined trust in doctors, feelings about nudity, and “butt confidence.”
“Our approach has always been rooted in education, transparency, and reducing stigma around topics that are often misunderstood or avoided altogether,” Goldstein adds, pointing to Bespoke’s surveys as an extension of that approach. “Clinically, penis size can influence sexual experiences in different ways, especially in the context of anal sex and bottoming, which makes education, communication, and preparation essential. What most people don’t realize is that above average and below average penises can both cause issues for the receiving partner.”
So, what sort of data did this self-reported survey offer?
The average erect penis among people residing in the 50 states – apologies to D.C., Puerto Rico, and other American territories – is 6.34 inches. Also, 67% of respondents overestimate their penis size, which may have inserted an obvious fallacy. Perhaps the meatier question is which states boast the largest erections, 7 inches or more. According to respondents, that comes down to Arizona, Iowa, and South Carolina. Fully eight states registered at the other end, at 5.4 to 6 inches.
But that’s just the tip of the data iceberg. The survey’s exploration into more emotional areas may have been more telling. Respondents who identified as gay, for example, were 11% more likely than their straight counterparts to report that penis size affects their confidence when approaching a sexual partner. And penis enhancement, were cost not a consideration, is of far greater interest to bisexual men, versus gay or straight men.
However one might weigh the survey’s relevance, Dr. Michael Grey offers that simply starting a conversation about penis size and related issues has some worth.
“It can definitely be helpful to de-stigmatize,” says the California-based psychologist/sex therapist, adding that possibly half his patients have issues regarding their penises. The most common issue, however, may have less to do with size than with circumcision. “There’s a lot of stigma around cut versus uncut.”
Regardless of a patient’s particular penis issue, Grey says it’s always going to come back to finding ways to accept oneself.
“This is the body you’re born into,” says Grey. “At the end of the day, we have to embrace our body, because it’s the only one we have. A lot of people treat their body like a rental rather than a forever home. This is the one you’ve got. And your penis size does not define your value.”
Milo Miles, an adult performer with a master’s degree in public policy, who spent years working at a Canadian public health unit before entering the adult-entertainment industry, certainly knows plenty about penises. And he agrees with Grey, as well as many survey respondents, that penis size is overblown, pointing out that he’s gotten varying results, whether measuring or marketing his member.
“I have been grossly overestimating my own dick size without even realizing,” Miles confesses with a laugh, explaining that the Bespoke survey results prompted him and friends to discuss the size subject. “We got a boner and pulled out the ruler. I came in at 6 and a half inches, even though I’ve been publicizing 8 inches for the longest time.”
Miles says, however, that he believes the size of his penis may have changed over time, and that genuine measurements have genuinely ranged to a notable degree. He references the survey’s finding of respondents overestimating the size of their penises, and makes an estimate of his own: “Honestly, 99 percent of guys I’d guess probably overestimate their penis size, whether accidentally, incidentally, or purposefully.”
Similar to Grey, Miles also guesses that circumcision carries more weight than size, at least when it comes to gay men’s feelings about penis appearance.
“From the early years of me jumping on Grindr, sex apps, one of the first questions is ‘Cut or uncut?’” recalls Miles, who got circumcised in his mid-20s. “I remember completely being shunned, ignored, or even blocked as soon as I mentioned that I had a foreskin.”
He also agrees with Grey that it’s paramount to be comfortable in your own body, regardless of what might be changed or what is immutable.
“To me, confidence is sexy,” he says. “I am less concerned about someone’s penis size than I am about how they present themselves. The longest dicks don’t necessarily feel the best. I’ve had some small dicks that felt amazing because it’s like the perfect proportion to hit my prostate. … I think it just comes down to people’s self-confidence.”
Regardless of the takeaways, as long as the dialogue around affirming sexual health is happening, Bespoke Surgical is, arguably, hitting its marks.
“There’s a significant amount of anxiety and misinformation when it comes to topics like this, often driven by unrealistic standards or a lack of reliable data,” says Goldstein. “By putting real numbers and context around it, we’re able to normalize the conversation, alleviate some of that pressure, and create a space for a more grounded, honest dialogue around sexual health.”
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